Wow...two nights in a row! So, as promised, I will write tonight's blog about my first packet of this semester. I was fairly excited about it because I decided to go back to the beginning of the novel and fill in the first few chapters. I started with an article that was written about a missing girl. I felt this intrigue the reader and already give some foreshadowing. Reiko (my advisor) really liked it...so that was good. I wrote my annotations on Rebecca (the minor character's importance), Affinity (auhor's use of senses), and Beloved (empathic character). Reiko approved all three...and gave me some great compliments. She said she was impressed with my annotation on Rebecca, and that my annotation on Affinity was "almost perfect." I was really happy, considering that many students struggle to pass her annotation inspection in the first packet with her :) For my creative work, she started her comments to me by saying, "This is very smooth and immediately engaging work, Tara." That made me so happy! I hope she felt the same about the ones that followed! One suggestion she made was that she would like to get a better feel for where we are - suburb, middle of nowhere, etc. So I do need to go back and fill in some details to help with that. Next, she suggested that I strike a balance between what I tell the reader and what I hold back. She said, "Tease us with some answers while you are raising more questions." So I need to work on that, too. The last part of our dialogue weighed heavily on the dream portion...because I was still working out how to structure that. I was still deciding if I wanted it in first or third person...if I wanted present or past tense...etc. So that was rocky in the first packet. I wrote the dream, but I felt that it didn't work at all. And she agreed...so packet two took a different direction there. The last part of the letter discussed the long critical paper...and oh boy was that a challenge! At the time, I was still working out what my topic should be. I won't even go into that...or you will go as insane as I did! So...here is a portion from packet one:
She had not realized,
but it must have rained while she unpacked;
she could see the lingering moisture on the leaves as it glistened. The overgrown thick branches and twigs that
protruded from either side of the disappearing path scratched her bare legs as
she waded through them. The silence
inside the green dome was almost eerie, and she felt like an intruder slicing
through it.
When she stepped out from the woods, Emma was in the
backyard of a large, grey shingled house with white shutters. The grass and weeds stood high, tickling her
knees, and the length of it did not shorten as she approached the house. She gazed up and saw that a window that was
likely the eyepiece to the attic was broken.
Shards of glass decorated its frame, and Emma realized that the
beautiful house must be abandoned, which was odd since it nestled in an area
thick with houses. The house seemed
almost a macabre snapshot in the middle of a Monet sky.
